Kyra Cornelius Kramer

You have got to be joking …

We were supposed to sign the closing papers to sell our home today at 10:00 AM. At 9:00 AM I get a text from my realtor saying that the buyers (who have been twerps from start to finish) now have “concerns” about the possibility of human remains on our property because it is close to a tiny, defunct family burial plot from the 1880s and cannot possibly close today because of these concerns. Concerns they have NOW after being informed of the plot months ago and forcing our realtor to jump thorough hoops proving it isn’t on our property or that our property didn’t encroach on it.

Just, are you freaking kidding me?

I don’t know what shenanigans they are trying to pull – if they are having trouble with their mortgage company or are making a last ditch effort to coerce a lower price – but we are officially sick of their malarkey and have instructed the realtor to put the house back on the market as of today. I am vexed.

Worse, these are the raging buttholes who demanded, in spite of our entreaties, that we be out of the house by June 23. You know – tomorrow. So I’ve had to call to cancel the movers, and am now trying to see if the condo lease I am breaking (I was supposed to pick up the keys at NOON today) will allow me to get my deposit and rent back. Better yet, I have packages and official documents being sent to that address that I now have to locate. Meanwhile, I have given away most of the furniture and things I would otherwise enjoy in the remaining weeks in my home, such as my television set.

Fun times.